The Experience Of Kindness In Business…

“To cultivate kindness is a valuable part of the business of life.” – Samuel Johnson


The success of a brand depends on the experience of the brand. Beyond what you do or provide, who you are informs the experience. Set the tone, maintain it, protect it. Up and down, inside and out let the experience of your brand and its people be one based on kindness, integrity, and cordiality. Be recognized not only for what you do and how well you do it, but for who you are and how you make people feel.



The Costs of Workplace Rudeness

Uncivil behavior at work takes a real toll on employees, research finds

Wall Street Journal

by Jennifer Breheny Wallace



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Every day is a choice, choose well.

Every day is a choice, choose well.
Your ability to live at your highest level may be challenged, some days are harder than others. Life continually surprises you, but at times the surprises are wonderful and amazing.
You don’t need to say everything you think, you don’t need to act on every thought, and sometimes taking a deep breath truly does make a difference.
Being kind and doing all the good you can not only improves the world around you, but that kindness and goodness is beneficial to the quality of your life as well.
Fall Afternoon in Amawalk...
Fall Afternoon in Amawalk…
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Personal Safety While Living a Public Life…


I am a Realtor, a therapist, a teacher, a writer, and a consultant. I work with charitable organizations, I support causes that are near and dear to me, and I am a patron of the arts. I have a worldwide network of friends, colleagues, associates, and acquaintances that overwhelmingly make it a joy to be a committed citizen of the world. I take full responsibility for the information and content that is available to the public, but at the same time I reserve the right to shut down any negative activity, association, or harm directed at me by others.  Don’t even get me started if that negativity is directed at my family or friends. I am blessed with the people I have in my life because of the way I value, care about, and protect them. It makes no difference to me what your station is in life – if you are in my circle you are valued, as is your privacy and safety.


I also have a very large circle of friends, associates, colleagues & acquaintances in the social media community. If I have not accepted your friend request, or deleted your friend status, it is for a reason. If I don’t follow you it is for a reason. Primarily I do this when I feel your intent toward me, or those I am connected with, is questionable at best. If I see that I have no logical association with you, if you have a sketchy profile, or if I know you in real life to an extent that I do not want the energy you put out in my life in any way shape or form I will not accept you into my virtual life.


Don’t ever mistake my kindness with stupidity, my professionalism with vulnerability, or my choice to let most things go with my inability to act when necessary. My resources to secure my own safety, as well as those I care about, are all in place. My contact list would astound you, and my ability to track you down if necessary is pretty awesome. I am smart, I am responsible, I take precautions to make sure that everything possible is in place so that I can live the life I live focusing on the positive adventure of it all.


As I review my lesson plan for The Family Program regarding safety concerns for kids, parents, and families my focus is proactive. Have your safety parameters in place, talk about potential risks and develop plans to avoid and or deal with them, be educated as to how social media works and know that everything you put out there on line is out there forever – and is traceable.


Personal safety as a Realtor, both in person and on line, is also a very topical subject. We have always been aware of precautions that should be in place, but recent news headlines have shown that we are perhaps not cautious enough.  We become complacent, and are all only human in subscribing in the belief that it will never happen to us. At the same time the nature of our business is such that our image and our contact information is readily accessible on a global scale. A good friend and professional safety instructor, Thomas Grimes of New York’s Finest Speakers, said something that solidified the need for Realtors to be proactive – “Realtors make their living meeting strangers in empty houses.”   That sobering thought is always top of mind when making sure that I have steps in place to conduct my business in a way that does not put me at risk.


In the past month I have experienced harassment in person, online, and via text message. My ability to judge “threat level”, as well as my sense to call my professional personal safety resource to make sure I have put all appropriate precautions into place makes me feel that I have taken all necessary steps. Adult bullies, cowards that hide behind technology, or someone with true nefarious intent – I do not want to be the person that did not take the time to make a good judgment call in this arena. Know that when these things happen I have a plan – go to the place of my cold black heart, gather resources, and put an end to it. Having this plan in place allows me to continue living the adventure of my life feeling secure, happy, and positive as quickly as possible. I choose to live my life in a spirit of kindness, compassion, and service and will not allow anyone to take that away from me.


When my kids would push the line a little more than they should, my response was always “if you think that is happening here you picked the wrong mother”.  To those that make the mistake of pushing the line with me now – you picked the wrong woman.


black heart

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Practically perfect in every way…

This morning I took a quiz to find out “what my Disney personality type is” – what a special answer. I am Mary Poppins!! This means so much to me because Mary is my ideal, my role model as a Mom, and pretty much my favorite Disney character (after Dopey of course!). I always say that my mothering role models are Mary Poppins & Samantha Stevens in Bewitched. Loving & honest, fair & firm, fun & adventurous. When we went to the costume exhibit at LACMA a few months ago Julie Andrews’ costume was on display, I loved seeing it, and fell in love with her scarf. This Christmas I received the most wonderful gift from my uber talented daughter Katie – an exact replica of Mary’s scarf! She researched the needle size, yarn type, colors…everything. Tears were copious! Now you may understand my daily aspiration (and source of anxiety) to be practically perfect in every way!

Mary Poppins!
You’re Mary Poppins! Your personality most closely aligns with the ESFJ personality type, or “the Caregiver”. Always energetic, outgoing, polite and proper, you are happiest when you can help someone. You have an incredible depth of generosity and compassion in your heart and you place great value on harmony and loyalty. You may come across as bossy (even when you’re singing!), but it’s only because you care so deeply for those around you that you’re willing to push them in the right direction when they need it. You’re a true provider for those you love.

Mary Poppins Scarf Katie

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World AIDS Day, Friendship & Making A Difference

On World AIDS Day, and always, I remember my dear friend Silvio – “Sal”.  We met at three years old in dance class –  went all through school, community theatre, Broadway treks, and exploring NYC together. Regardless of where we were at in life, we always kept in touch and maintained a life long friendship. I spoke with him often during his final days at Cabrini Medical Center, until he literally could not speak anymore. When he died, the devastation of AIDS became a personal issue for me. I looked for ways to honor Silvio’s memory, but also to make a difference in his name. My search led me to Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS & God’s Love We Deliver – two organizations that I am proudly a part of still. While today we do not experience the daily loss of family, friends, and co-workers as I did starting in the early 80’s – we are still a world in which HIV/AIDS is a health issue that needs to be eradicated. The focus in ways has changed, due to the hard work of many, to assist and encourage long lives of those living with HIV/AIDS. There is great hope, and good outcomes – but AIDS is still a killer among us. Today on World AIDS Day, and always, look for ways to do good, be educated, and make a difference.


Pat & Silvio

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Top Ten Things Overheard At The River….

I love everything about the theatre, including eavesdropping on my fellow theatregoers. While I imagine no comment will ever come close to the person at Jersey Boys who asked their companion “did you know this was a musical?” – there were some pretty amusing comments during previews of The River. Admittedly The River – starring Hugh Jackman, Cush Jumbo, and Laura Donnelly – is deeply layered, symbolic, and mystical; however, some of the confusion seemed to involve much more basic deductions.  The beauty of the work, written by Jez Butterworth and directed by Ian Rickson, is that each person will be moved by it in a different way and perhaps leave with more questions than answers. That being said, I think we can all agree that it’s pretty obvious that it is a real trout Hugh is preparing on stage each night…


Top Ten Things Overheard at The River …

10. You better turn your phone off, I saw him stop a show and yell at someone on YouTube…

9.  Do I turn this off with the selfie button?

8.   Are there real birds in here?

7.   Is he a serial killer?

6.   When will they tell us what happened?

5.   Is this like Scoop?

4.   I think that was a real fish….

3.   I can’t believe they won’t let you take pictures in here…

2.   Why are they harassing me about not being able to be late or get up during the play? They sent me an email…

1.   The show was about this guy having a threesome…

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Find Magic Today….

Sometimes we go through life from one task to another without truly being present to the world around us. We miss beauty, moments of gratitude, and the opportunity to connect with others.

When we are in that mode we might walk past a window that the sun is shining through without even noticing it. We might not appreciate what a gorgeous day nature has provided us. We might miss a moment to be thankful for our ability to see and walk and think.

Practice being present to the world around you. Connect with the people, gifts and moments that make our lives richer. Make it a point to find magic.

Sometimes it’s just a window that the sun is shining through, but in a moment of being present it is so much more. For me I saw the light of God and love…

God Light - The CloistersSaturday afternoon moment of magic...
God Light – The Cloisters
Saturday afternoon moment of magic…
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18th April 2014


End hunger. End poverty. What is you initial reaction to this directive?

What if I told you there was a way you could be a part of the community working to accomplish these goals by the year 2030? What if I told you that you could be a part of it through generosity of action and deed, willingness to share the message is all that’s required?

Would you do it? Would you be a part of it? 

Let’s plan to get together so I can share with you how the Global Poverty Project is making a difference through education and information – I would be happy to help you learn more, and perhaps set up a presentation for you and your group.

Would you like to start making a difference sooner? Like today?

Join me as I #livebelowtheline from April 28th through May 2nd. I have promised to live on less than $1.50 a day during that week in awareness of those living in our own communities, countries and world who know extreme poverty. You can support me, and Global Poverty Project, by making a donation on my page.

You can also choose to participate in #livebelowtheline yourself, sign up at

End hunger. End poverty.

I am working toward a solution, are you?

– See more at:

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Fashion Reboot – Edit Your Wardrobe, Upgrade Your Style

Imagine if every item of clothing, shoes and accessories that you owned were the inventory of your own personal store – sorted by size, color, and department. Now imagine that you have unlimited spending power in this custom boutique, what would you buy? I don’t know that any of us would choose to buy everything – remember that sale, that fad, that size you will be soon, or that shoe that ran big? Obviously you wouldn’t buy anything stained or ripped, and you probably would sort out items that needed to be altered to see if they are worth the investment. You definitely would want to try items on, if you have to hold your breath or be in pain while wearing it do you really want to own it? Once you have eliminated the obvious – how do you edit the rest to create your ideal wardrobe?

Jesse Garza & Joe Lupo of Visual Therapy have written one of the best five step “get your act together” books for fashion- Nothing to Wear? From defining your style to maintaining and nurturing your new sense of style, this is a gift to all who want to establish their very own fashion sense to those who are ready to take it to the next level.

Nothing to Wear? is a great framework to build your wardrobe, Jesse and Joe also have written Work It!: Visual Therapy’s Guide to Your Ultimate Career Wardrobe and Life in Color: The Visual Therapy Guide to the Perfect Palette — for Fashion, Beauty, and You! Once you have the basics down, you can build from there. The basics really work for everyone and make a difference not only for your professional life and major events, but for your day to day activities. Who hasn’t met someone they would like to make a good impression on in the supermarket or at the post office? You can be at your best even in your “running errands” gear.

I like to revisit step #2  – Edit Your Wardrobe – every so often, especially during my fresh page mindset that comes with each January 1st! My biggest downfall is the idea I grew up with of “saving for good”. While this made sense in the  post depression age of my mom and her generation where budgets were tight, and items were few, realistically right now I will not live long enough to wear what I may be potentially “saving for good”. This also brings about the idea that fewer quality pieces that are versatile make a lot more sense than a closet divided between amazing and, well not so amazing.

Make sure to have the organizing 101 tools of a keep, throw away, and give away box/bin/bag. An additional benefit to editing your wardrobe is the ability to pass on items to those who could really use them. If you have a lot of professional pieces make sure to check with local organizations that assist those searching for a job – they truly appreciate being able to help their clients put their best foot forward while interviewing.

One of the best gifts of really putting your wardrobe together is time. If everything you put your hand on is wearable, looks good, is clean and in great condition, and you can locate it easily it will be a game changer. You also add a boost of self confidence when you know you look good,  and you feel good in what you are wearing.

Ferragamo Tina Pump - Brown, Burberry Leather Trimmed Felt Fedora
Ferragamo Tina Pump – Brown, Burberry Leather Trimmed Felt Fedora


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